Friday, March 30, 2012

CC's Three Free Thoughts o' the Day Fo'ya

Sometimes I get to thinking.  Not about fiscal solvency, political turmoil, crime rates, international business transactions, professional sports, the ex-wife, falling amounts of creativity in Canadian universities, or theatre culture in Toronto, just thinkin'.

  1. The nail on my smallest toe is so small I don't even know what it's doing there.
  2. Despite the fact that rice has been a food staple for somewhere around twelve thousand years, I am still completely unable to cook it properly.
  3. The average age of the boiz is 25.222222222222222.

Monday, March 26, 2012

Lad of the Week

Hi folks. Thorough here. Let’s cut to the chase and take a quick look back on the week that was.

We saw a massive heat wave sweep Ottawa and boiz, oh boiz, it was hotter than an Albertan brushfire. It was even hotter than the ex-wife’s legs – and she had great legs. She also had a strong left-hook, but great legs. This week of condensed global warming was just excellent. It was great for shirts vs. skins basketball games and drinking mojitos on the patio at the Pump, but, more importantly,  it was great for zoomin’ the ladies, creepin’ the ladies, and skeetin’ the ladies. This week reminded me of how much I love legs. Legs are awesome, also, play this in the background when reading this post. I’d like to gobble down a whole batch-load of lady legs for breakfast. Nom nom nom.

Saturday, March 24, 2012

For a good time, stay the hell away from my apartment

I don't know what it is, but weird shit tends to happen to me on a pretty consistent basis. So often in fact, that I've made a habit of leaving my apartment less frequently than I did in the past. Step out the door and I'm bound to end up at some foreign party, drunk and disorderly, touching all sorts of strange people. Go to sleep one night in the comfy confines of my own bed, wake up two nights later in a Chicago hospital with a lampshade around my neck. Leave a birthday celebration with my friends for a mid-afternoon date with a rocket I'd been zooming for a while, end up back at home wondering what in the world prompted me to kiss her on the top of the head, instead of simply saying "goodbye". Sure, I let alcohol get the best of me sometimes. And yeah, maybe I err on the side of social awkwardness more often than not, but I swear this world is out to make me into some sort of caricature sometimes. WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME, PEOPLE????

Monday, March 19, 2012

Lad of the Week

 
Jason Russell is a man of many talents.  He can pull the heartstrings, he can hike in jungles. And he can solve problems.

Know what a big problem these days is?  Warlords. And specifically their penchant for recruiting child
Jason Russell: Beating off religious militants, one stroke at a time.
soldiers.  Warlords have had a rich history Ghengis Khan immediately springs to mind.  But these days, in our modern, rat-race, work-a-day world, the romanticism of these particular brand of assholes has faded significantly. No one likes a warlord, that's just a fact.

Thursday, March 8, 2012

On The Issue Of...

Subletting my apartment.

That's right everybody, Latch Out Loud has followed the lead of the rest of the world and has succumbed to the forces of corporate soul sucking...also known as advertising. Those of you who are keen readers of the blog might have just thought "Yeamax, CC has already done a post on book bag advertising!" Well, that was all about the concept of advertising; it wasn't an actual advertisement on the blog. Have we at Latch Out Loud sold our souls to the corporate shills that pervade so many aspects of our day-to-day lives? In short, no.

Monday, March 5, 2012

Lad of the Week




Allow me to introduce you to Connor Crisp.

Now I know what you’re all thinking, who in the hell is Connor Crisp? And until Sunday afternoon I would have said the exact same thing. “There is only one CC in my books,” I likely would’ve shouted.